31. May 2026

Pause, Ground, Decide: A Leadership Skill

In contract catering, decisions are rarely made in calm, quiet moments. They are made in the middle of service, under pressure, with competing demands from clients, teams, budgets, and time. In these moments, how we show up matters just as much as the decisions we make.

At Stillingpoint, we often return to a simple but powerful question: Who is making the decision right now?

The Three Voices Within

Transactional Analysis (TA) offers a useful lens. It suggests that we operate from three primary ego states:

• Parent – learned beliefs, rules, and judgments
• Child – emotional responses, impulses, habits
• Adult – present, grounded, data-informed, and responsive

In contract catering, it’s easy for Parent or Child to take the lead:

• The Parent might say: “This is how we’ve always done it—don’t question it.”
• The Child might react: “This is too much—I’m overwhelmed, just get it done.”

Neither is inherently wrong—but neither is ideal when navigating complex operational decisions, client relationships, or team dynamics.

What we need is the Adult.

The Adult State: Where Good Decisions Live

The Adult ego state is not cold or detached it is clear. It integrates information from both Parent and Child but is not ruled by them. It asks:

• What’s actually happening right now?
• What information do I have?
• What outcome are we aiming for?

In contract catering, this might look like pausing before responding to a last-minute client request or stepping back from a staffing issue to assess root causes instead of reacting emotionally.

But here’s the catch: accessing the adult state isn’t just a mental exercise—it’s a somatic one.

Why the Body Matters

The Strozzi Institute approach to somatic coaching reminds us that our thinking is shaped by our physiology. When we’re rushed, tense, or triggered, our body shifts—and so does our decision-making.

You can’t think clearly if your system is in reactivity.

That’s where somatic grounding and centering come in.

A Simple Practice for Busy Environments

In the middle of a service, a meeting, or a difficult conversation, try this:

1. Ground
Feel your feet on the floor. Literally press them down. Notice your weight.

2. Centre
Bring awareness to your lower body—hips, legs, core. Let your breath drop lower.

3. Lengthen
Gently lift through the spine. Not rigid—just upright and available.

4. Breathe
Slow, steady breaths. In through the nose, out through the mouth if possible.

This takes less than 30 seconds—but it shifts your state.

From there, ask: Am I responding from Adult, or reacting from Parent or Child?

Applying This in Contract Catering

Let’s make it practical.

Scenario 1: Client Complaint Mid-Service
Child reaction: defensiveness or panic
Parent reaction: blame or rigidity
Adult response: grounded listening, clarifying facts, calm resolution

Scenario 2: Team Under Pressure
Child reaction: frustration or withdrawal
Parent reaction: command-and-control
Adult response: assess capacity, redistribute resources, communicate clearly

Scenario 3: Financial Decisions
Child reaction: avoidance
Parent reaction: overly conservative or critical
Adult response: balanced, data-informed, future-focused

Building a Culture of Adult Leadership

This isn’t just about individuals—it’s cultural.

When leaders consistently operate from a grounded Adult state, teams begin to mirror that:

• Communication becomes clearer
• Reactions become responses
• Problems become solvable

And in an industry like contract catering where margins are tight and expectations are high that shift is not just beneficial, it’s essential.

Final Thought

You don’t need more time to make better decisions you need a different state.

The next time pressure rises, don’t push harder.

Pause. Ground. Centre.

Then decide.

That’s where your best leadership lives.